Breaking Away from a Soul Tie: When Your Past Still Sleeps in Your Spirit

You’ve moved on—or at least, that’s what you tell yourself. You stopped calling, deleted the pictures, even prayed the prayers. But sometimes, late at night, when the world is quiet, their name still echoes in your chest. You can almost feel their presence, like a memory that refuses to die.

You see someone who laughs like them. You hear a song that once played in their car. Suddenly, the peace you thought you had feels fragile again. You’re stuck—loving someone you no longer want, bound to someone you no longer have. That’s not nostalgia. That’s a soul tie.

And before you step into marriage, before you promise forever to the one God is preparing for you, there’s a question you need to ask yourself:

You are ready for marriage, yes. But are you ready for deliverance from the ones your soul still remembers?

Let’s talk about soul ties.

The Invisible Threads: What “One Flesh” Really Means

A soul tie isn’t a modern invention—it’s woven into Scripture. In Genesis 2:24, it says, “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.”

The Hebrew phrase “dabaq” (דָּבַק), translated “joined,” means to cling, adhere, or be glued together. It’s not casual connection; it’s covenantal fusion. God designed intimacy—spiritual, emotional, and physical—as a permanent bond that holds two lives together in purpose and destiny.

When Jesus repeated this verse in Matthew 19:5–6, He emphasized, “What God has joined together, let no one separate.” The Greek term for “joined together” is “syzeugnymi” (συζεύγνυμι), which literally means to be yoked or harnessed together. It’s the same imagery used for oxen pulling a plough—two moving in rhythm under one purpose.

That’s what sex and deep emotional intimacy do: they yoke two souls. And when that connection happens outside of covenant, the bond remains—but the rhythm breaks. What was meant to carry life starts dragging death.

Jesus’ statement that “whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery” (Matthew 5:32) wasn’t condemnation—it was revelation. In God’s design, the spiritual bond remains, even when human contracts dissolve. He wasn’t shaming the divorced; He was pointing to the divine permanence of union. The system was designed to last. That’s why broken soul ties hurt so much—they were never meant to be broken.

When Your Past Has Access

You may not realize it, but every time you give someone intimate access to your body, you open a door to your soul. Sex is not just biological—it’s covenantal (I don’t even know if its a real word).

Paul’s message in 1 Corinthians 6:16 is clear. “Do you not know that he who is joined to a prostitute becomes one body with her? For it is said, ‘The two shall become one flesh.’”

Here, Paul uses the same Greek word “kollaō” (κολλάω), meaning to glue together, to bind closely. It’s the strongest possible form of attachment. What he’s saying is that sexual intimacy fuses two souls whether they intend it or not.

That’s why memories can haunt you. Why you can feel someone’s emotional pull even years later. It’s why some people relapse into toxic relationships—they’re spiritually glued.

The story of Dinah in Genesis 34 drives this point home. When Shechem violated her, her brothers Simeon and Levi responded by slaughtering his entire city. Jacob later cursed their anger, saying, “Cursed be their wrath, for it is fierce” (Genesis 49:7). That act of defilement opened generational wounds. Sex didn’t just touch Dinah’s body—it invaded her lineage.

Spiritually speaking, every act of intimacy—holy or unholy—creates access. That’s why bloodlines carry both blessing and bondage. It’s not superstition; it’s spiritual law.

The Weight Before the Wedding

Marriage doesn’t heal you—it reveals you. If you carry unhealed soul ties into marriage, they will show up as comparison, emotional withdrawal, or unexplained dissatisfaction. You can’t merge fully with the one God has for you while parts of your soul still belong elsewhere.

Before you pray, “God, send me my spouse,” you may need to pray something else first. “God, set me free from who still owns pieces of me.”

God doesn’t just want you married—He wants you whole.

Read Purity Pursuit to learn more about living pure

Jesus: The Breaker of Bonds

Here’s the hope—Jesus Christ is the ultimate Covenant Restorer. Isaiah 61:1 says, “The Spirit of the Lord is upon me, because the Lord has anointed me to proclaim liberty to the captives.”

The Hebrew word for “liberty” there is “deror” (דְּרוֹר), meaning release, freedom from debt or bondage. Through His blood, Jesus pays every spiritual debt, cancels every illegitimate covenant, and restores your soul to purity.

When He declared, “It is finished” (John 19:30), the Greek word was “tetelestai” (τετέλεσται)—an accounting term meaning paid in full. Every soul tie, every bondage, every spiritual IOU from your past was settled at the cross.

So when you pray for deliverance, you’re not begging God to break something new—you’re enforcing what Christ already accomplished.

How to Walk in Freedom

Freedom is not forgetting; it’s being unshaken. You may still remember the past, but it no longer controls you.

Here’s how to live it out:

• Confess and Repent – Acknowledge every tie that still binds you. Speak them before God.
• Renounce the Bond – Use your authority in Christ. “By the blood of Jesus, I break every ungodly soul tie with ABC. I reclaim my soul, mind, and body for God’s purpose.” ( mention their name, if you cant remember their name its okay, but hold on…. what do you mean you don’t remember their name? anyways, the holy spirit will remember to forget them for you.)
• Forgive and Release – Forgiveness is not weakness; it’s spiritual surgery. It cuts the tether.
• Clean the Physical Space – Remove reminders—gifts, photos, messages. You’re symbolically closing the door.
• Fill the Vacuum with the Spirit – Replace what left with Scripture, prayer, worship, and fellowship.

You can’t stay empty; emptiness invites old spirits back. Jesus warns in Matthew 12:43–45 that unoccupied space becomes a playground for familiar bondage. Fill your space with God.

A Prayer for You

Father, I thank You that You designed my soul for covenant, not confusion. I bring before You every person my body or heart has been joined to outside of Your will. I repent and renounce every ungodly soul tie formed through sin, emotion, or trauma. By the blood of Jesus, I cancel every spiritual contract that gives them access to me. I forgive those who hurt me and bless them to walk in Your light. Restore the fragments of my soul and make me whole again. Prepare me for the covenant You’ve written for my life.

In Jesus’ name, Amen.

The Beauty of Redemption

You are not defined by who touched you, loved you, or left you. You are defined by the One who redeemed you.

Breaking a soul tie isn’t about shame—it’s about freedom. It’s about standing before God and your spouse whole and healed, not haunted. It’s about loving without fear, giving without fragments, and walking in the purity of God’s design.

Because when your soul is finally free, you don’t just marry a person—you enter a covenant God blesses.